I've just been browsing some gorgeous blogs. Whilst trying not to give in to comparisons and criticism, I still felt the little claws of envy pushing in to me as I ogled and fawned over beautiful graphics, stunning photos and extra-ordinary women's lives.
Half an hour later my emotional crucifixion was well underway with my inner monkey voice saying things like 'their website is so stylish, looks nothing like yours', they're riding motorbikes, have a gorgeous hubby, the cutest kid and live in the most amazing eco house they built out of beer bottles' oh and the sun always shines...you need to do more Dal...you need to work harder, go on more adventures, start collecting beer bottles...
So, I pull myself back and say to my good s-elf - Dal...there is something really incredibly blissful about being perfectly ordinary...and perfectly content...
As I recover from my summer burnout, shingle bells and an infection I feel a lift in my soul and a sense of new beginnings and excitement. I relish the slowness and the ordinariness that I've re-connected with that somehow got lost over the last couple of years in a sea of busyness and needing to be ‘out there’.
I’m just enjoying the simple act of living the life in front of me right here and now. Of not needing to search for the next high or big adventure.
I love my ordinary moments and my ordinary life.
I love that I feel I have nothing to prove.
I love that I can be ok with simple accomplishments or even none.
I love the fact that I can forget perfect (perfect words, perfect photos, perfect ideas) and still put my work out on my little sacred cyberspace.
I love the clouds in the sky and the raindrops that fall out of them.
I love the purple covered moors of the Peak District that awaken me to wonder.
I love the silence in my home whilst the neighbours are away.
I love the squishiness of my bed and getting tangled in my duvet.
I love it when my brother in law says 'Dal' and I say 'yes' and he farts and then I roll my eyes with my sister and we laugh (even after 17 years!) .
I love my first coffee of the morning.
I love chatting over the fence with my neighbours.
I love the scratch of a pen in my notebook.
I love mature cheddar cheese on toast. Too much.
I love soft old jeans with rips and tears and memories.
I love night walks, the wrap of the dark and peering in to people's living rooms.
I love my old banger that's still going strong after 13 years.
I love needing less and living more.
I love my sacred solitude.
I love walks in the park with my american friend and listening to the soft lilt of her southern accent.
I love lie ins and late nights.
I love that right now I don't have a map and am not sure where I'm heading.
Everything so ordinary. Costs nothing. No goals required. No achiever fever. No credit card bills.
The little moments of life. Tiny blessings.
Quiet. Ordinary. Blissful.